For many people it's easy to take care of others. You see a friend in need and you run to the rescue. Your boss needs something done at midnight, you are all over it. Your partner needs you to stay home and wait for the plumber, no problem. But how much thought do you put in to your own self care? Sometimes it's hard to even identify that you need to set some time or energy aside for yourself. Often people don’t notice until a crisis occurs that they are in need of some serious nurturing. How do we get better at paying attention to our own needs, saying "No" to others when we need to? How do we provide ourselves with the care we deserve?

The Signs:

Feeling burnt out? Depressed? Anxious? Tired all the time? No energy or passion for activities you normally would be enthusiastic to participate in? If you are having any of these feelings on a regular basis you have already missed the early signs indicating you should take a pause for some self care. Lets back up and bring awareness to your every day state. If you are noticing any of the following it's time to take note, and start making a plan to take care of yourself.

You are feeling unappreciated
Your daily schedule does not include you time
You feel like you can't stop and relax or shut off your brain
You don't see your friends or family (or you don't want to)
You are underslept
You are irritated or annoyed by most things
You feel overwhelmed much of the time
You don't enjoy a majority of what you do on a daily basis (everything feels like work)

If you see these signs in your daily life or every couple of months they appear, take note and start adjusting your day to include things that nurture you and make your life a little bit easier. A great way to pay more attention to what is going on with you is to take a few minutes in the morning and evening and do a body check. How's your thinking? How are you feeling? Any body aches and pains? Noticing little indicators before the big storm comes can jump start your ability to be aware of what you need and not feel burnt out and cranky.

Saying "No":

This is a tough one. Saying no to plans, work, friends, and family can feel impossible but if you are having a hard time it can be the best thing for you. So, how do you do it? Start small. Saying no to a low stakes event like happy hour at work or lunch with a friend will be a lot easier than trying to explain to your best friend you just can't listen to her talk about that guy anymore because it's bringing you down. Another helpful hint, remind yourself why you need to say no. You are not being "mean" or "selfish." You are taking care of you.

How To Take Better Care Of Yourself:

This will be different for everyone. Maybe you need to meditate. Exercise. Eat Better. Snuggle with a puppy. If you need some ideas of how to start incorporating more self care into your life check out these links:

https://www.buzzfeed.com/lorynbrantz/16-small-acts-of-resistance-for-your-mental-health?utm_term=.lim2PK4dP#.yo2y3V7k3

https://www.popsugar.com/fitness/Self-Care-Bucket-List-42871595

The idea here is to start listening to your mind and body, and react in a kind, nurturing way to what you hear. If you wake up every morning and think "I just can't do this commute anymore.", start thinking about ways to make it easier and TAKE ACTION. If your job has become unmanageable then look at your daily activities and figure out what would make it more rewarding or less overwhelming. Once you truly incorporate the idea of self care into your daily life it will get easier to do the things that make your life better.